plz talk dirty to me
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
