Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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