Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
