Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
