Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
