but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
