Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
