We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
