she was so not down for the gang bang
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
What drink are we having for lunch?
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
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