So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
