I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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