Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
