She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
