You really coming over, don't trick.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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