you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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