oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize