I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
are you so shy because you have an std?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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