Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
kristin has been a bad kristin
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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