i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Randomize