Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
