She's JV to your varsity
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
