its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
