I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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