At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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