She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
