she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
