Betty ford says i'm here all night
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
