This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize