Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
