it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
