oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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