I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
