I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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