everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize