Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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