morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize