just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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