I will die if light touches me.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
you win again, gameday.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have already put on my inside pants.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize