My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
