At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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