Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
