But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
