how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
