This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
