So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
