she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
