Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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