You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
