What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize