i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize