So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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