Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
