The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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